Thursday Funnies

--> Three friends from the local congregation were asked, "When you're in your casket, and friends and congregation members are mourning over you, what would you like them to say?" Artie said, "I would like them to say I was a wonderful husband, a fine spiritual leader, and a great family man." Merle commented, "I would like them to say I was a wonderful teacher and servant of God who made a huge difference in peoples lives." Don said, "I'd like them to say, 'Look! He's moving!'"

--> Smith climbs to the top of Mt. Sinai to get close enough to talk to God.
Looking up, he asks the Lord, " God, what does a million years mean to you?"
The Lord replies, "A minute."
Smith asks, "And what does a million dollars mean to you?"
The Lord replies, "A penny." Smith asks, "Can I have a penny?"
The Lord replies, "In a minute."

-->A man goes to see the Rabbi. "Rabbi, something terrible is happening and I have to talk to you about it" The Rabbi asked, "What's wrong?" The man replied, "My wife is poisoning me." The Rabbi, very surprised by this, asks, "How can that be?" The man then pleads, "I'm telling you, I'm certain she's poisoning me. What should I do?" The Rabbi then offers, "Tell you what. Let me talk to her. I'll see what I can find out and I'll let you know."

A week later the Rabbi calls the man and says. "I spoke to your wife...spoke to her on the phone for three hours. You want my advice?"
The man said yes, and the Rabbi replied, "Take the poison!"

I-Cord BO???

Does anyone know what "I-Cord BO" is? I mean, I know how to do an i-cord, and I know how to bind off, but I have never heard of an i-cord BO.
It's for my felted messenger bag (it's the large one, not the small one), and the instructions are:
"Using MC k52, using CC BO rem sts using I-Cord BO. At end of round, place I-Cord sts on st holder"
So, I'm a little confused. It sounds like I'm binding off using some weird method, but then it says to put the i-cord stitches on a holder, so it sounds like they weren't bound off at all. Am I just being dumb, or does that sound confusing?
Please somebody help me if you can, cause I'm so psyched about this bag!

Finally, with Pictures!

This is the bag I just finished last night, pre-felted. Here is a picture of what the bag will hopefully look like once I've felted it. The seam I used to connect the body of the bag to the bottom was a single crochet seam, which is so much easier than using the blunt needle. It's a great seam to use, especially when felting, because you can tell where the body of the bag ends and the botton of the bag begins.

This is a close up of the bag. I used Rose Garden Landscapes by Lion Brand and Daffodil Wool of the Andes. I can't wait to felt this puppy. Just need to find a pair of jeans that need washing.

Here is what's left of the two skeins that I used for the Emma Clutch Bag. I got two balls of Black Essential Sock Yarn and two balls each of the multi-colored striped yarn. The green one is Parade Sock Yarn and the orange one is Simple Stripes Sock Yarn. I've been searching for a sock pattern that has more texture, such as ribbing or ripples, but will do well with self-striping yarn. Anyone come across such a pattern?

This is the yarn that I bought from The Celtic Knot last week with Maire. There was a display scarf that used the ribbon (shown in the middle) coupled with a mohair yarn. However, my scarf isn't turning out the way it looked in the store. I think that the mohair that I'm using is way too thin for a drop-stitch scarf. I'm either going to buy another ball of the mohair to make the scarf thicker or I'm going to buy a ball of thicker mohair. Haven't decided yet. Another option is to block the scarf and maybe it will look better, but I'm afraid there still isn't enough substance, you know what I mean? The way it is now, it's too drafty. There's no way that scarf would keep my neck cozy. I know it's not a wool scarf, but I need a little warmth, right?

Yarn Market

I don't know if you guys already know about this site, but I sure didn't and I'm in love with it! Just thought I'd share...

http://www.yarnmarket.com/

Hello Mountains...Here We Come!

It's official...we're moving to Charlottesville. I guess all that anal-retentive organization of the apartment hunt on Saturday paid off. As soon as I walked into the house, I was in love. Hardwood floors, screened in porch, 3 bedrooms (one in the attic with a den), a large backyard for grilling and entertaining, it truly is a beautiful house. Gorgeous, just gorgeous. And I won't talk numbers, but rent is good, not too shabby if I do say so myself. Of course, while on site, we couldn't resist asking what we needed to do to rent the place. We couldn't walk away from this house, we just couldn't. Of course we learned that someone was ahead of us, had already submitted their credit check, just waiting for the okay from the landlords. And from then on, it was a little touch and go, with ideas and notions of living in not such nice places, and smaller places and large big enormous places and phone calls to family asking what we should do and not do, driving everyone, I mean, everyone Mishuganah. Of course, I wanted to decide on a place, and Noah, being the reasonable and practical one kept himself (and me) level headed. Let's not rush, let's be sensible about this, it's not the end of the world. But, I just didn't want to accept that, cause I knew nothing would compare to this beautiful house. I mean, who in the heck would believe that you could rent a whole house this beautiful for such a reasonable price? But in the end, our prayers to the apartment renting goddesses were answered. The deciding phone call came last night, and leases were faxed and deposits were overnighted...it couldn't have been more beautiful. We hope all our friends and of course our family will come and visit. Heck, we have plenty of room for a long stay and plenty of grounds for Beans to cover. And by the way, I've already begun scoping out the closest yarn stores!

Recap on Grey's Anatomy

Since Ms. JaKnit was in cyclone land, she may not have seen Grey's Anatomy so let me just say this...Meredith Grey is a knitter!!!! Can you believe it? Don't worry, you didn't miss Meredith knitting last night, but we saw a glimpse of her knitting in two weeks. Not that we don't already, but we need to make sure we are all knitting with Meredith in two weeks, you know, to support knitters who are watching Grey's Anatomy, or, um, something like that..okay, we don't need a reason, I just like the idea of knitting while watching Meredith knit.

So, I'll try to recap what happened, using the episode guide from the show's website. It says "When a series of deaths occur at Seattle Grace, the uncanny events bring out the doctors' superstitious sides and make Izzie nervous about Denny's surgery. Meanwhile, Derek and Addison discuss making a more permanent living arrangement, and Richard treats a very special, old friend." To begin, I don't remember anything about Derek and Addison discussing making a more permanent living arrangement so if anyone has anything to say about that, fill us all in. Next story line: Alex and Izzie were assigned to Denny's case, prepping him for surgery cause he had a clot in his heart, and Alex being the a** that he is, told Denny that dying was a serious possibility, instilling in him true fear that he was going to die. Izzie got pissed that Alex told Denny he may die, and broke up with Alex. Izzie and Denny kissed at the end of the show, which was so sweet, and Alex acted like an a** again, yelling at George about the way he was reacting to the crisis with him and Meredith, telling everyone in the locker room that George was acting the way he was because he wasn't over Meredith and he was sick of the way he was moping around the hospital. Seriously, I do not like Alex one bit right now. I have a sincere dislike for him, deep down inside. Next Story Line: Dr. Burke's superstitious ritual is wearing his own scrub caps, you know the caps you tie around your head. Well, he was very upset when his caps hadn't arrived at the hospital. Christina, knowing that Dr. Burke was upset about not having his caps, told him that she had one of them and gave him an ultimatum - the cap in exchange for George moving out. Dr. Burke, being the smart and sexy man that he is, used his intellect and got George to try and get the cap back from Christina. In the end, Christina gave it back to Dr. Burke, but only after she told him that he didn't need it, because he was an excellent doctor. She even admitted that she kept the cap in her locker so that she could look at it everyday, since it reminded her of the type of doctor she wanted to be and why she wanted to be a surgeon. Very un-Christina-like, but very touching. Okay, Next Story Line: Going on theme of superstitious rituals, Addison has a ritual of giving everyone hot chocolate, which she calls Joo-Joo after an operation fails (May need a little clarity on this story line). Anyhow, Addison gave Meredith some Joo-Joo, which Dr. McDreamy witnessed and was impressed at her kindness toward Meredith. Addison admitted since Meredith and Dr. McDreamy were friends, by proxy Addison and Meredith were friends. Meredith took a sip of the Joo-Joo and then threw away the cup. Not sure if there was any significance in the fact that she threw away the cup, but the same thing happened again when one of Meredith's patients died after refusing to have surgery. Moral of the story is: Never deny Joo-Joo...or something like that. Again, may need some clarification on that story line. And then a few straggling stories - The doctor that likes George, the one who gave him her number the night he moved out of Meredith's house, was pissed at him because he didn't call. Well, he really wanted to go out with her, and so he called her, from his cell phone on her cell phone, while they were in the same room, apologizing for not calling sooner. It was very cute. Hmmm, I can't remember if there are any other major moments that I've forgotten to mention, but if I have, I'm sure Maire will fill us in.

In knitting news, Maire and I received our order from KnitPicks. I finally got the 2 skeins of Wool of the Andes in Daffodil that I was waiting for to make my Emma bag. The bag is knit from the top, and I've made it down to the handles. I can't wait for this bag to be complete! This is one of the few projects that I've come across and actually went looking for the exact yarn that the pattern calls for. Took some planning, which exercised my anal-rententiveness which often gets in the way of my knitting. I also ordered some sock yarn, but I can't remember the styles and colors, so I'll take some pics and post them.

Also, does anyone know if you can felt two different projects together in the same wash? I made a Booga Bag a while ago and I was thinking of putting them in the same wash to felt them. What do you all think about that?

Adventures of Exploration and Apartment Hunting

Okay y’all, I’m just warning you now so no one gets disappointed. I am not going to write about knitting (okay maybe a little at the end but not right now). Sometimes I get spurts of writing enthusiasm and share with the world what I’ve been up to these past few days. You see, Noah got into grad school (and not to brag about him, but of all the schools he has heard from, he’s gotten into all of them…okay, I’m done bragging, at least for now). And the greatest news is that he got into UVA and that’s his first choice. And of course, I’m all excited cause it means that all of our fantastic dreams of Charlottesville may actually come true. We have plans to go down to Charlottesville tomorrow and what started out as a little excursion to see the town and explore, has turned into me pretending like we’re gonna find an apartment. You see, we just want to go and get a feel for the area and I thought to myself, “What better way to do that that to see apartments in different areas of the town?” And I’m queen of apartment hunting. And let me tell you why! Two summers ago, when Noah and I were living in Brooklyn, New York, I thought I had my living situation all worked out for the following fall semester, you know…who I was gonna live with and how we were gonna find a place and I didn’t worry about it for one minute. Well, needless to say, that did not work out the way I had it all perfectly planned in my mind. So, after a few fits of tears cause I had less than a month to find a place to live, I took charge the way I like, armed with a folder, a pad of paper and a pen and I went searching for an apartment. I went on Craigslist and apartments dot com and findanapartmentpleasenowbeforeistarttolosemymind dot come and I picked a day that Noah and I were gonna drive down to Maryland. I made a pretty little schedule of when I was going to see the apartments with all the apartments printed out and all the best features color coded and highlighted and all ranked from best to worst on a scale from one to two hundred making notes before and after and in between. I mean, I was organized. I made Martha look bad. And of course I found an apartment. A cute row home in Charles Village for the cheapest rent in town, which I would later found out was because I was living on the edge of the ghetto but that’s besides the point.

So, I was excited this week to put my apartment hunting skills to use, and off I went calling places and e-mailing places and checking my e-mail and my voicemail every other minute, and much to my chagrin, there are not a lot places available. They’ve been gobbled up pretty quickly, but I may have found a few hidden jewels, lurking in the wings. I’ll be sure to take pictures of any cute places and hopefully, we’ll fall in love with our future home town.

As for knitting, Maire and I visited The Celtic Knot yarn store in Ellicott City, Maryland on Thursday and of course, I couldn’t leave without buying something. I ended up bringing home some very thin metallic cord to be doubled with a thin strand of mohair, in the hopes of a making a drop stitch scarf. The store had the same materials knitted into this drop stitch scarf pattern, but of course, when I got home to try it out, mine didn’t look like the one in the store. I’m thinking that the mohair is way to thin, cause right now, it looks not so much like a scarf but more like a string of loops. I’ll be searching for some thicker mohair, so the scarf can keep me warm. Who needs a drafty scarf? Pictures in time my friends, pictures in time.

Broad Street Mittens... Finally!!!

Here they are! If anyone is interested in knitting these, let me know and I will give you my modified version of the pattern explaining how to do the second glove (as well as correcting some of the mistakes from the original pattern). Honestly, these were not that difficult. If you can use dpns, you can make these. I promise!

Kids Say the Darnest Things

A three-year-old boy went with his dad to see a Litter of kittens. On returning home, he breathlessly informed His mother, "There were 2 boy kittens and 2 girl kittens." "How did you know?" his mother asked. "Daddy picked them up and looked underneath," he Replied. "I think it's printed on the bottom."

Another three-year-old put his shoes on by himself. His mother noticed that the left shoe was on the right Foot. She said, "Son, your shoes are on the wrong feet." He looked up at her with a raised brow and said, "Don't kid me, Mom. They're the only feet I got!"

On the first day of school, about midmorning, the Kindergarten teacher said, "If anyone has to go to The bathroom, hold up two fingers." A little voice from The back of the room asked, "How will that help?"

A mother and her young son returned from the grocery Store and began putting away the G! Roceries. The boy opened The box of animal crackers and spread them all over the Table.. "What are you doing?" his mother asked. "The box Says not to eat them if the seal is broken," the boy Explained. "I'm looking for the seal."

A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin, Five, and Ryan, three. The boys began to argue over who Would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the Opportunity for a moral lesson. "If Jesus were sitting here, He Would say, "Let my brother have the first pancake. I can wait." Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you Be Jesus."

A father was at the beach with his children when his Four-year-old son ran up to him, grabbed his hand, And led him to the shore, where a seagull lay dead in the Sand. "Daddy, what happened to him?" the son asked. "He died and went to Heaven," the dad replied. The Boy thought a moment and then said, "Did God throw him Back down?"

After the church service a little boy told the pastor, "When I grow up, I'm going to give you some money." "Well, Thank you," the pastor replied, "but why?" "Because my Daddy says you're the poorest preacher we've ever had."